Dreamscape Dream Escape

Sven calls. Says she wants to punch the world into the ocean.
I think we are galaxy full.

Clark's Dollar

Me and Bird lookin at Brooklyn

Bird is a Roll Monster

Grin Goner

I’ve been assigning longing
for so long
I forgot

“You’re a secret prude oh my god!
Throw a dart and you’ll find a straight girl to fuck.”
-Tom

that really I want one set of hands
just one to touch my face
make it feel real

every bull shit sidestepped moment
every bent over blunder
every ghost fuck

(a presence can be felt
and not be true)

anyone could do it
press tipped fingers in on
my check bones

make my face
feel like a
cliff

This is a castle

It lives in Greenpoint. It's where I found it.

I'm love

(note: lacy right after she fell out of her own chair. i love calling us an old married couple cause we are like the opposite except for when we fall out of our chairs. four days is too long.)

Sophie's Island aka Peas in a Pod

One Morning in Dream Town

I empty a bottle and I feel a bit free
- The Clash

1.
how much can we say to no

the phone was ringing
but I thought it meant I had to get up
so I ignored it
on accident

Sweden was calling Clark was sleeping in his car just around the corner
of Brooklyn
and me

it’s six am and we both
have the soft thaw on
the glacial way life
moves you from one foot to the next

he is white from cigarettes and all the night car
I am fuzzed from the one last lost shot shot shot
three hours ago

so this morning just below the glass bridge
Sophie’s is an island for the lost boys
Lacy glow purrs sleeptime on the small couch

Clark and I play with bird dog
the sun touches up on dream town

and when we walk out into the lighthouse
the river looks more like an ocean than a
pulmonary ever has before

waves howling up at the twilight firmament
the river looks like a destination and
not the slip

2.
Josh says when I am really tired
sometimes I get so tiny
you can’t see me

at the bar the other night I was over it
tired all and all
of or with or for
the momma bear to all the flickering boy hearts
tossing the bar about in the 3 am

I’m sorry I think
I was listening to the sound
of me tuning you out

but then again it all comes
back down the spine

with the weak position behind her
eye sometimes

like how she'd like
the desert cause it seems like skin

and I watch the sky
cause its what’s inside

Come Back Little

(photos by Little)

Billbo I Miss You Already

Zach is Back: Thank God

(click on my letter to read a Zach's story / click on the man to see his armadillo)

note 18

philly

blah blah panic attack blah

note 17: and come upstairs...

(note: peter)

Love Vs. Itself or

"well me cause there is no us when she is gone"
-Jessica is laughing

Sven: Not possible. You are my heartbeat.

Me: I would say you are my beaten heart but that would be a romantic lie. You are my most healthy heart.

Sven: I fucking love you. Doz just kicked me in the face. With that I return to this tired slumber.

Doz





vs.

"I am going to relapse. You're being judgmental."
"Please T unfixate. Please."

you are an arteried thing

Josh brings me a note he found on the way to work.





Love is As
Painful as Death!
Love is just a
four letter word
just like Pain!




ps. somewhere in between

"Did I say keep looking at me? Cause what I meant was don't.
Back when I meant what I meant what I meant."

-mutter mouth loud then small then loud and small
-the narrative goes love and need are two separate beasts

two seperate beats

-tell them I am jar sized now walk through me





Vital heat, also called innate or natural heat, or calidum innatum, is a term that has generally referred to the heat produced within the body, usually the heat produced by the heart and the circulatory system. -Wikipedia

Me and My Cute Face

Old School

(flier: peter/ bathroom slept in by me/ photo: timmy tutu)

Public Domain: True Ribs

You know I hate the word Lover: Kim Addonizio

From Last Call

It’s when the woman in the corner gets up
and wobbles to the middle of the room,
leaving her blouse draped over a stool. Someone is buying
the house a final round, the cabs are being summoned,
and the gods that try to save us from ourselves
are taking us by the neck, gently,
and dropping us into the night, it’s the hour
of the blind, and the dead, of lost loves
who come to claim you, finally, holding open
the swinging door, repeating over and over
a name that must be yours.

From The Numbers

—I don’t know
how many hungers there are, how much radiance or salt, how many times
the world breaks apart, disintegrates to nothing and starts up again
in the course of an ordinary hour.

I want to kiss the body of my lover, the one mouth, the simple name
without a shadow.

- Kim Addonizio is fucking awesome!

My First Ladies

(photo: porte)

Gray

I have been thinking about taking a toothpick to my neck. That is, as though you could spear the tiny bulb of blood in the crook of the common carotid artery. Pluck the motherfucking pocket of pulse and squeeze it between tired fingertips.






Beating balloon. Thumbprint size. Weigh it in the palm of your hand or maybe roll and flip it back and over your knuckles like a coin.

notes 15 16

notes: blaze and adam 2003ish
(click on the pupil/star)

note fourteen: the waves size up

note: peter

Evan Boy Model Dunn

Thoughts that are making me happy sad sane crazy:

1. Bird

2. M comes home to get the rest of her stuff. J is lying on the hard wood floor where the bed used to be. He drinks a 22-ounce can of beer without lifting his head. “You should come over sometime,” she says. “Yes totally. It will be fun… we could play chess.” J taps his head softly against the ground.
3. Billy

4.The one time I went to walk Bird when we got out the door tiny bits of white paper were flurrying down around us. Timmy Twelve Step or Timmy Tutu, depending on his mood, reached a scissored fist out of my bedroom window. Proud of himself he grinned, “Look Anna! Snow!”
5.
“ you got a face with a view/ I’m just an animal looking for a home”-Talking Heads
6.
The conversation that went like this last time it happened:
Me: I lost my phone to the ocean!
Mike: You threw your phone in the ocean.
Me: No more like I took my pants off and it floated away. Seems to be a trend.
Sven: Oh Yeah?
She grabs her cell phone.
Sven: I just lost mine to a cocktail.
She tosses the only cell phone we have left in the house into her travel size mug of vodka OJ and looks at me.
7.
So many people who have offered to take me in. Elizabeth says I should definitely stay at her house! That I can look at all the books and records and… I can read letters, which strikes me as the intellectual or emotional equivalent of going though someone’s underwear drawer. Then she tells me she is off to make a sculpture of a warm puppy.
8.Thinking about moving here...




9.I arrive at Bravo Supermarket exactly 3 minutes before they close. And I see a lady bagging the last of the broccoli and have a nervous breakdown in my mind. Then she looks at me. "Did you want the broccoli? Have it. I was just gonna buy it cuz it was on sale." I want to tell her I'm really not gonna cry over the greens and she should keep them but I screamed so loud in the car ride over that I gave myself a sore throat. Instead I nod thank you but she has already moved on.
10.
Why a warm puppy? Because the Charley Brown thing. “Happiness is a warm puppy.” Note above photos.
(dog photos: porte)
(ps if you click on Guy Jones' trailer someone has keyed "1.5 trailer park" on the front)